By Ada Student
Hi!! I’m Ada, and I have no less than fifty academic integrity violations! I specialize in writing papers for other classmates, but I’ve been known to dabble in stealing answer keys and recycling old assignments. Now, you probably know that violating academic integrity is fun and an incredibly helpful victimless crime, but did you know that you can also make money off it? That’s right! Charging desperate students $15 a page for essays they just can’t be bothered to do adds up quick, and before you know it you can be making enough money in a semester to buy textbooks for the next.
Surprised? I was too! A friend of mine who never showed up to lecture and didn’t even had a textbook was worried about his psychology paper, so I offered to do it for him. It was just a bit of fun, I could only submit one paper and couldn’t narrow down my topics so it was nice to be able to do two. To my surprise, he venmo’d me $60 a few days later! It was amazing to see that one of my favorite hobbies (essays) could actually turn a solid profit! From there, I was addicted. I could write all the essays I had time for, and the money couldn’t stop flowing in.
Of course, all this comes at a price: this is technically against the rules. Not the little “teacher rules” where you’ll just get shamed in front of the class and maybe lose points, but me and my clients could all get kicked out of school if we were caught. It’s stupid, I’m just trying to run a business, but if Rutgers gets its big nose involved then I’d be facing some serious disproportionate retribution. To be honest, though… running around, trying to get customers without anyone at Rutgers finding out… that’s part of the fun. And so is the knowledge that if I get taken down, I can take dozens of people with me. This all started as an innocent hobby, then a job, but I like playing a puppetmaster a lot more.