By Richard Hunter
For those of you not in the know, De Blob is a simple but satisfying puzzle platformer starring the titular “blob”, some kind of life form that can absorb color and transfer it to any surface he touches. The game tries to tell you that the story goes like this: the evil “INKT” corporation has sucked all the color from the world, and Blob has to put it back. This is the child-friendly story that De Blob tricks your parents into buying the game for innocent children with, but a little bit of digging will reveal the truth.
As I’m sure you all know, the gay pride flag is black, brown, red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple. Blob can paint the world any one of the last seven colors on that list, with the exception of black. This is because black and white are the colors of the INKT corporation, and also the colors of the straight flag. So obviously, at the core of De Blob is a conflict between gay people and straight people, and the player character leads the charge of the gays. This is exactly the liberal propaganda that the left wants to infect our children with, brainwashing them with pro-gay ideals.
And you know what? De Blob is so arrogant, they rub their plan right in the faces of the innocent consumers they’re corrupting. Regularly throughout the game, you’ll be able to “liberate” the citizens of the world by turning them from a perfectly normal gray to all different colors of the rainbow. De Blob is turning your children gay, and isn’t even trying to hide it. Protect yourself, play something innocent like Mass Effect, and don’t even think of buying this propaganda.