Bill Nye Announcement Causes Outrage

By Sawyer

PROTESTORS OUTSIDE OLD QUEENS: Members of the Creationists Coalition voice their unwelcome opinions.
PROTESTORS OUTSIDE OLD QUEENS:
Members of the Creationists Coalition voice their unwelcome opinions.

NEW BRUNSWICK- Clamor has swept throughout Rutgers as graduating seniors are abuzz with excitement over the appointment of Bill Nye “The Science Guy” as this year’s University Commencement speaker on May 17 at High Point Solutions Stadium. Nye was first proposed by a duo of bow-tie aficionados in the class of 2015 back in the beginning of the Spring semester. Although there was nothing short of support at that time, Nye’s recent confirmation has incited inevitable protests this month.

Protesters representing the Rutgers Creationists Coalition are calling for the Board of Governors to rescind the invitation to Nye, claiming that he actively misleads the public by promoting the acceptance of “climate change” and denying the veracity of Creationism.

Taniya Williams, a MGSA senior, is one of the student leaders spearheading the protests.

“Bill Nye has no right to take the name of Science and contort its authority to his own ends. You don’t see Pope Francis misleading people by invoking the Lord’s name to get rich and famous.”

The opposition has even taken to social media, as it did last year with #NoRice, by encouraging people to praise Creationism and denounce Nye by using the hashtag “#DeNYEd”on all platforms. Some popular posts include: “Bill Lie the Lie-ence Guy! #DeNYEd”, “Doctorate not in Theology? #DeNYEd”, and “Rice is Nice, but Nye should Die! #DeNYEd”

The student and faculty-run movement has scheduled protests and collaborated with missionaries on campus to hand out more Bibles and more educational leaflets about the science of Intelligent Design. One recent, notable instance of protest occurred in an Environmental Science class when Williams rang a cowbell to drown out every time the professor used the phrase “Climate Change”.

University administrators who organize the event had been holding out the announcement for weeks. They claimed, “People shat themselves when we dropped Bill Nye’s name. Legit, this could not have been more hyped!”

Administrators remain optimistic however that Nye will not decline his speaking invitation despite all of the ongoing protests. When reached for comment on the protests, Nye is quoted to have said, “Those troglodytes are throwing more shit than their less-evolved cousins.”

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