Paterno-Sandusky Statue Back Up Thanks to Overwhelming Support

BY Rebellious John Clayton

"back and better than ever"     A recent photo of the newly-returned statues of Joe Paterno and Jerry Sandusky. Penn State boosters are flirting with the idea of erecting a statue of a crying child next to Sandusky in memory of how Sandusky was victimized by the  "hurtful" and "false" allegations of children.
“back and better than ever”
A recent photo of the newly-returned statues of Joe Paterno and Jerry Sandusky. Penn State boosters are flirting with the idea of erecting a statue of a crying child next to Sandusky in memory of how Sandusky was victimized by the “hurtful” and “false” allegations of children.

State College, PA— The breaking of the Sandusky child molestation scandal was one of those moments for college football fans that was so profoundly impactful that people can tell you to this day where they were and what they were doing when the news went viral. Sandusky’s touching of children touched the hearts of fans of the sport across the nation. It took a scandal such as that one for people to finally be willing to admit that maybe they took the sport a little too seriously, that the importance of football paled in comparison to the torment and the loss of innocence young children were experiencing at the hands of a powerful football coach. Fans from every program were united in thinking this way, and lended their full support to the children affected and their families.

Fans from every program except the school from Pennsylvania, that is. Penn State fans have felt deeply wronged by all of the fallout from the scandal. But the one thing that caused the most public outrage and rioting was the removal of the Joe Paterno and, perhaps more importantly, the Jerry Sandusky statue from outside of Beaver Stadium.

“Yeah, it was total bullshit!” long-time Nittany Lion fan Greg Hardy told reporters. “So what, this stuff happens at every program. Open your eyes NCAA! They were just on a witch hunt to knock us off, but they’re finally making up for it.”

Hardy is referencing the fact that the NCAA recently restored 112 of the school’s wins that were vacated, as well as their expedited return to bowl eligibility they enjoyed this past football season.
“Now that Jerry is back watching over the little kiddies that walk into Beaver Stadium on Saturdays, it just feels like a wrong has been righted,” deranged Penn State fan Lyla Jensen also said.“The public treated him unfairly, and he thoroughly deserved his statue back.”

Athletic Director Sandy Barbour chimed in as well. To the public, she raised this rhetorical question: “Yes, Jerry Sandusky made a mistake. But we all make similar mistakes. Look in the mirror. Can you honestly tell yourself that you have never sexually abused minors? Now think about if we overreacted to Jerry’s mistake, and I’m sure you’ll agree we have.”

Penn State fans are not remaining complacent despite their recent victories. A fan group, “#FreeJerry”, has gotten 106,000 members to rally in support of freeing Sandusky from prison. That number, while impressive, pales in comparison to the membership of the “Hire a Necromancer to Bring Back Joe Paterno” fund.

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